Worst Pinball Experience?

BennyJackdaw

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Aug 20, 2017
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A few days ago, I played Sonic Adventure for the first time. I have no idea why I like the game. It's aged so poorly, yet I still like it.

I will say this, though, the Casinopolis pinball tables play horrifically. For a game that prizes itself of its speed, the pinball in this game is incredibly sluggish, like playing pinball in super slow motion. The physics don't even remotely resemble real pinball. It's made worse by the fact that Sega's done better than this as far as pinball, and even made real pinball tables such as Starship Troopers. Embarassing. I know it's a platformer, and Sonic Spinball was a Platformer/Pinball fushion and Sonic's Pinball Party was straight up pinball, but it's still kind of stupid that both of those provided pinball that was eons better than Sonic Adventure.
 

lio

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Jul 24, 2013
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Apart from downright broken tables that just eat your money and have broken flippers or ball ejects my worst experience was probably stern's "striker extreme" (in working condition)... I had never played it before, put in 5 bucks for 7 games and walked away after 3 or 4 games because I just really disliked the table.
 

zmcvay

Member
Sep 19, 2014
356
5
For Computer Pinball, probably Sierra's 3-D Ultra Pinball. The first one anyway, based on Outpost, I remember the sequels being somewhat better. Quite probably the worst pinball physics I've seen in a commercial product, graphical glitches galore, and a dull layout.
 

mystman12

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Apr 21, 2013
173
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Out of sheer curiosity I bought 101 Pinball World on DSiWare. Literally every time I play it I find some new horrifying glitch or oversight. Most of the machine layouts feature objects that sit right in front of the flippers, making shots up the playfield impossible. I can't count how many times the ball has just phased through the flippers. The only "rules" to the games are, after about 1 minute of nothing, some text will just pop up on the bottom of the screen giving you certain goals. One of the goals that pops up from time to time is "Let the ball pass through the flippers."

Yes. I'm not kidding. When this comes up you literally earn points for letting the ball drain and it gives you your ball back.

Also here's the soundtrack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAFhHeACwXg

The worst part is, it costs the same as Pinball Pulse: The Ancients Beckon, which was made by the people who made the Pro Pinball games and is on the same platform. It's fantastic, and one of my favorite video pinball games.

Apart from downright broken tables that just eat your money and have broken flippers or ball ejects my worst experience was probably stern's "striker extreme" (in working condition)... I had never played it before, put in 5 bucks for 7 games and walked away after 3 or 4 games because I just really disliked the table.

3D Ultra Pinball: Thrillride is the only good one of those. It's the only one that has a ruleset with similar style to real life pinball games. Lots to do, with a wizard mode for anyone who can do everything.
 

Phil_194

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Jul 9, 2017
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I love 3D Ultra Thrillride, I get overwhelmingly positive vibes when I play it everytime. However there is some frame rate stutter which I'm assuming is because I'm running it on a modern operating system (Win 10). Either that or my laptop is more underpowered than I thought.

Worst pinball experience? Hmmm... well when I play Bonebusters I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to do. I wouldn't call it a good introduction to pinball myself, but it's partly my fault for not reading the instructions. I like the music.
 

Kolchak357

Senior Pigeon
May 31, 2012
8,102
2
Orbitor 1 is up there for me too. But I will go with Hercules. Huge and a true pinball spectacle. But so boring to play.
 

Extork

New member
Mar 14, 2013
1,811
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I can't believe how many times I plunked money into that thing hoping the experience was gonna get better. It never did.

Oh get over here you big lug. Hercules is my middle name. Sounds like an awful experience, that table
 

Wolis

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Jul 12, 2012
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Oh get over here you big lug. Hercules is my middle name. Sounds like an awful experience, that table

I found Hercules to be lots of fun. It had a very simple layout but with that simple instructions and I found it easy to play. I would love to play it again.

My worst, I generally blot them out, but most Bally tables from the 70s,like Paragon.
 

Extork

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Mar 14, 2013
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I found Hercules to be lots of fun. It had a very simple layout but with that simple instructions and I found it easy to play. I would love to play it again.

My worst, I generally blot them out, but most Bally tables from the 70s,like Paragon.

I have a very simple layout
 

BennyJackdaw

New member
Aug 20, 2017
37
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Honorable mention I have to give is to this one game that came in a 50,000/70,000 game collection(HUGE exaggeration, there's nowhere near that many games in those collections) called Mega Pinball. There are three tables: A medieval one, a science lab one and a circus one. The real honorable mention is the circus table: which is basically unplayable due to the fact that the launcher does not send the ball into the table so you can play it.
 

Jay

Member
May 19, 2012
478
3
3D Ultra Pinball: Thrillride is the only good one of those.

That's remained one of my all-time favorite digital pinball tables.

As far as my worst experience, it's probably been some of the amusement park arcades I've been in where they have long-neglected EM machines that appear to work but wind up with dead bumpers or flippers. The greatest offender is Hercules, which can be a really fun table when it works, just because of its absurd size. But it's been over a decade since I've found one in decent condition. It's usually a waste of quarters.
 
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shutyertrap

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Staff member
Mar 14, 2012
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Computer pinball: MS Pinball Arcade. I was so excited when I saw it, and it looked good, but it played terribly. I suffered with it for a few weeks, thought to myself there has got to be something better, and most importantly something with Williams tables. Eventually I discovered Visual Pinball, back in 2002 I think, and never touched MS Pinball Arcade again.

Real pinball: Pizza parlor near me had a NASCAR and I plunked in my $2 for 3 plays. Problem was, the magnets that fling the ball around the bottom of the table didn't work. So I'd launch the ball, it'd drain, but the ball save would load another ball, and this repeated for as long as I was willing to plunge. Eventually I fooled it somehow, got the ball in play on the table, only to hit a ramp shot that sent the ball on that path again and the ball drained. I complained to the cashier, and she just said they weren't responsible for the machine, the table operator is. I left the other 2 credits on the machine and walked.
 

Jay

Member
May 19, 2012
478
3
Computer pinball: MS Pinball Arcade. I was so excited when I saw it, and it looked good, but it played terribly.

That's interesting. I find that remarkably it still works in Windows 10. That game is nearly a quarter-century old now. The graphics are certainly not hi-res, but I still enjoy playing it. And heck, for a game that old I'm amazed at what they were able to accomplish. The physics in it still beats the modern recreation of Pinball Dreams, which has the wonkiest physics I've ever encountered. In this age, there's no excuse for physics that sloppy. Also, I haven't seen anyone else recreate Slick Chick, one of the all-time great EM tables. And there are some other rare Gottlieb machines in the collection that are really fun.
 

mystman12

Member
Apr 21, 2013
173
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I do enjoy Microsoft Pinball Arcade, as long as I stick to the older games. The ramp shot is near impossible on Cue Ball Wizard (Have no idea how that didn't get fixed, seeing as it's basically half the game), and Haunted House can feel a bit wonky too. I've really enjoyed the EMs though, especially Spirit of '76. I've gotten really addicted to that one.
 

shutyertrap

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Staff member
Mar 14, 2012
7,334
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That's interesting. I find that remarkably it still works in Windows 10. That game is nearly a quarter-century old now. The graphics are certainly not hi-res, but I still enjoy playing it. And heck, for a game that old I'm amazed at what they were able to accomplish. The physics in it still beats the modern recreation of Pinball Dreams, which has the wonkiest physics I've ever encountered. In this age, there's no excuse for physics that sloppy. Also, I haven't seen anyone else recreate Slick Chick, one of the all-time great EM tables. And there are some other rare Gottlieb machines in the collection that are really fun.

I mostly hated how the ball felt coming off the flipper. The angles just seemed all wrong.
 

Alex Atkin UK

New member
Sep 26, 2012
300
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That's interesting. I find that remarkably it still works in Windows 10. That game is nearly a quarter-century old now. The graphics are certainly not hi-res, but I still enjoy playing it. And heck, for a game that old I'm amazed at what they were able to accomplish. The physics in it still beats the modern recreation of Pinball Dreams, which has the wonkiest physics I've ever encountered. In this age, there's no excuse for physics that sloppy. Also, I haven't seen anyone else recreate Slick Chick, one of the all-time great EM tables. And there are some other rare Gottlieb machines in the collection that are really fun.

What modern recreation of Pinball Dreams is that?

I have always been sad that Pinball Dreams/Fantasies isn't on mobile as they were fun games.

I mostly hated how the ball felt coming off the flipper. The angles just seemed all wrong.

I hated how basic and fast it was, it felt like the playfield was literally vertical.
 
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